Archive for the 'Mental' Category

Dec 31

The Power of Less

Emotional, Financial, Mental, Physical Jason Mitchener 1 Comment »

Welcome back!

One of my favorite blogs to read is Zen Habits by Leo Babauta. Leo writes about many of the same subjects I do here on Forward Habit but in his own unique way. I don’t consider him a competitor, but another source that can help you attain your personal development goals.

Leo just released his book The Power of Less which teaches us how to simplify our lives so that we have more time (and money!) to focus on the things that are really important to us. In our ever-evolving world, it can be too easy to get caught up in the busy-ness and complexity of life. Leo’s book looks like a good aid to help declutter our lives both physically and emotionally.

I will post an in-depth review of Leo’s book the Power of Less in the coming weeks, but for now you can check it out on Amazon here:

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Aug 27

How to Stop Worrying by Changing Your Perspective

Emotional, Mental Jason Mitchener No Comments »

Worrying
(Photo by Naty Rive)

Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be. - Abraham Lincoln

My friend Tony once said that if he ever ended up in a wheelchair then he would kill himself. In the eighties, he crashed his single-engine plane and broke his back. He was paralyzed from the waist down and confined to a wheelchair. So, did he kill himself? Thankfully, no. Over twenty years later, he’s still alive and not even close to considering suicide. He is happy because he chooses to be happy.

I have been disabled all of my life. I was born with a rare neuromuscular disease that now confines me to an electric wheelchair and requires me to use a ventilator to breathe. Many people in a similar situation to mine have given up on life. I can relate because when I started using a ventilator at age twenty-one I wanted to give up also. For six months, all I did was stay in bed and watch television. Have my circumstances changed since then? No. I changed my perspective. Each day, I choose how I am going to relate to my circumstances. For the most part I choose to be happy and productive.

What situations cause you to worry? Can you change your perspective and make a positive choice to be happy despite your circumstances? Happiness is a choice. Will you make that choice today?

Forward Habit’s series on worrying:

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Aug 26

How to Stop Worrying by Appreciating What You Have

Emotional, Mental Jason Mitchener 3 Comments »

Worrying
(Photo by Geekgirly)

Several years ago, a guy came up to me before a church service and said, “This morning I was really feeling sorry for myself. Then I came into church and saw you sitting here in a wheelchair. You actually are worse off than me, but you had a big smile on your face. So I figured what do I have to complain about?”

This man learned a valuable lesson in how to stop worrying. He began to appreciate what he had.

Too often we worry about what we don’t have and don’t appreciate what we do have. We worry that we have bills to pay, but we don’t appreciate that we have a job to pay those bills. We worry about the high cost of our monthly mortgage payment, but we don’t appreciate that we have a roof over our heads. We worry about the cost of gasoline, but we don’t appreciate that we have a car. We worry about a toothache, but we don’t appreciate that, in general, we have good health.

Sometimes it takes seeing someone worse off than ourselves before we appreciate what we have. This is even true for me. By many people’s standards, I’m severely disabled. I use an electric wheelchair because I’m basically paralyzed from the shoulders down. I use a ventilator because I can’t breathe on my own. Yet even with these difficulties, I’m not as bad off as other people. My roommate has ALS (or Lou Gehrig’s disease). In many ways, he is worse off than I am. Most days, he doesn’t even get out of bed. Although he might also say he’s better off than me in the fact that he has children and grandchildren. So, in whatever situation we are in, we can always find someone worse off than we are.

Learn how to stop worrying by appreciating what you have.

How do you stop worrying? Please share your tips in the comments.

Forward Habit’s series on worrying:

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Aug 25

How to Stop Worrying by Facing the Facts

Emotional, Mental Jason Mitchener No Comments »

Worrying
(Photo by spaceodissey)

Do you really want to stop worrying? Then you need to face the facts.

The first fact you need to face is the chances of the thing you’re worried about actually happening.

I know people who are afraid of flying in airplanes. Their main worry is that the plane is going to crash. However, they are far more likely to get into a car wreck than they are to get into a plane accident. The chances of an aircraft accident are about 1 in 11 million, while the chances of a car accident are about 1 in 5000.

So, figure out what the chances are of the thing you’re worried about actually happening. If the chances are slim, why are you worried?

The second fact you need to face is what’s the worst that can happen if the thing you are worrying about comes to pass.

Truly ask yourself what is the worst that can happen if the thing you are worrying about comes to pass. Once you figure this out, be willing to accept the worst. But don’t stop there. See if you can improve on the worst.

Let me give you an example from my own life. Last month, I was worried that a bill would come in before I could get money into my checking account. The worst that could happen is that the bill would come in before the money did and I would receive a $35 overdraft charge. So I was willing to accept the worst, but I wanted to improve on it. I contacted a few friends to ask if they wanted to buy some of my art prints. The end result was that yes I did have to pay a $35 overdraft charge, but I made up for it by selling $200 worth of art prints.

So, if you’re worried, follow these steps:

  1. Determine what’s the worst that can happen.
  2. Be willing to accept the worst.
  3. Try to improve on the worst.

How do you stop worrying? Please share your tips in the comments.

Forward Habit’s series on worrying:

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Aug 23

How to Stop Worrying by Living in Today

Emotional, Mental, Spiritual Jason Mitchener 1 Comment »

Worrying
(Photo by pedrosimoes7)

Do you want to stop worrying? Jesus gave us one way how.

Whether or not you’re a Christian, you’ve probably heard of the Lord’s Prayer. In less than a hundred words, Jesus gives us a beautifully simple prayer that covers everything from the heavenly to the earthly. It deals with temptation, forgiveness, the sanctity of God’s name, and the will of God.

It also gives us a key to stop worrying. Jesus prayed, “Give us this day our daily bread.”

Today’s bread for today. What a simple but profound thought.

We don’t want yesterday’s stale bread. Or do we? Some of us focus too much on the past. What we could have accomplished if we had just made different choices. What we would have spent our money on if we had saved more. What we should have said instead of what came out of our mouths. Could have. Would have. Should have. Does it really matter? We can’t change the past. Why focus on it?

“Give us this day our daily bread.” Today’s bread for today.

We don’t want tomorrow’s bread either. We haven’t even baked tomorrow’s bread. Or have we? Are we spending so much time worrying about the possible trials of the future that we neglect the joys of today? Do we worry about whether we will have food to put on the table next month? Or next year?

“Give us this day our daily bread.” Today’s bread for today. Not yesterday’s stale bread. Not tomorrow’s unbaked bread. But today’s fresh bread!

What do you do to stop worrying? Please share your thoughts in the comments.

Forward Habit’s series on worrying:

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Aug 19

Causes and Effects of Worrying

Emotional, Food, Mental, Physical, Spiritual, Tech Tips Jason Mitchener No Comments »

Worrying
(Photo by Dawn Ashley)

There is nothing that wastes the body like worry, and one who has any faith in God should be ashamed to worry about anything whatsoever. - Mahatma Gandhi

Worry is something we have all dealt with in our lives. Our worries can be small or large. They can last for a few moments or for a few decades. If not controlled, worrying can have serious consequences on our health.

What are some of the common causes of worrying?

  • Job issues
  • Relationships
  • Finances
  • Health

What are the negative health effects of worrying?

  • High blood pressure
  • Weakened immune system
  • Stress hormones causing strain on the heart
  • Increased muscle tension
  • Headaches
  • Stomach issues including ulcers
  • Sleep disorders
  • Obesity or conversely loss of appetite
  • Possible shorter life span

With all the health dangers of worrying, it is vitally important to learn how to stop worrying. Further blog posts will show you ways to stop worrying. So stay tuned …

How has worrying affected you?

Forward Habit’s series on worrying:

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Aug 18

10 Surefire Tips for Remembering Names

Mental Jason Mitchener 1 Comment »

Shaking Hands
(Photo by arekolek )

Remembering people’s names is an excellent way to gain lasting friends and business associates, but all too often we meet a new person and we forget his name. What can we do to remedy this?

Below are ten surefire tips for remembering names:

1. Maintain a Positive Attitude - A friend of mine is known to say “I can never remember names” and she doesn’t. She has already set herself up for failure by having a negative attitude. By maintaining a positive attitude and telling yourself “I can remember names” then you are more likely to remember names.

2. Use the Name in Conversation - After you are introduced to a person, use his name in conversation. Say something like, “It’s good to meet you, Tom.” Repeat the name in conversation a couple times if you can and definitely end the conversation with the person’s name. For example, “It was nice talking to you, Tom.”

3. Associate the Name with Someone You Know - A few weeks ago, I met a nursing assistant named Julie. I told her, “That’s my mom’s name.” Now I easily remember the nursing assistant’s name because I associate her name with my mom. When you meet someone, try to think of a friend or relative with the same name and make that association. It may even help to say to the person, “Lillian? That’s my aunt’s name.”

4. Ask the Person to Repeat His Name - If you don’t hear the person’s name correctly, politely ask him to repeat it. He may even be impressed that you’re making an effort to remember his name.

5. Ask the Person to Write It Down - If the person’s name is unusual, ask her to write it down for you. About the same time I met Julie from tip #3, I met another nursing assistant named Oralia. After she told me her name, I still couldn’t quite get it so I asked her if she would mind writing it down for me. A couple weeks later, I saw her again and said, “Hi, Oralia!” Her eyes opened wide, her mouth broke into a smile, and she said, “I can’t believe you remembered my name.”

6. Introduce the Person to Others - If you’re in a group setting, introduce the person you just met to people you know. “Hey, Bob, have you met Sarah?”

7. Repeat the Name Silently to Yourself - While you’re talking to the person, repeat her name silently to yourself.

8. Use Alliteration - If you discover in your conversation that your new acquaintance Sarah is a secretary or Terry is a teacher, use an alliteration memory technique to remember their names by making a connection between the first letter of their names and the first letter of their occupations.

9. Create a Mind Picture - Using your new acquaintance’s name, create a mind picture. For example, if his name is Barry, picture him eating a handful of berries. If her name is Jaime, picture the letter J sitting on her head with a shirt that says “Me!” The more vivid the picture the easier it will be to remember.

10. Write It Down As Soon As You Can - As soon as you can after meeting a new person, write down his name and any other information that will help jog your memory.

Do you have any tips that help you remember names? Please share them in the comments.

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Aug 03

Personal Development Lessons Inspired by the Band Third Day

Emotional, Mental, Spiritual Jason Mitchener 2 Comments »

Third Day
(Photo provided by thirdday.com)

Third Day has acquired some huge stats. The Georgia-based band has won 23 Gospel Music Association Dove Awards, three GRAMMY Awards, earned two consecutive American Music Award nods, and multiple ASCAP honors for their songwriting skills. They have also 24 No. 1 singles and sold more than six million albums.

Now Third Day has released their 11th studio album Revelation and their stats are bound to get more impressive.

With such huge success, the guys in Third Day must surely have excelled in personal development. So what personal development lessons can we learn from the band Third Day?

The Importance of Collaboration

Third Day has proved they can succeed completely on their own. But with their latest release, the band collaborated with other artists to take their music to another level. Pedal steel guitar player Robert Randolph adds his touch to the rocker “Otherside.” Chris Daughtry adds background vocals to “Slow Down,” and Flyleaf’s Lacey Mosely adds her beautiful vocals to the songs “Born Again” and “Run to You.”

Collaboration allows us to add ingredients to our efforts that we can’t produce alone. If we seek out collaborators that will complement our vision, we will be able to achieve stronger results.

Stepping Out of Your Comfort Zone

Although Third Day is from Atlanta, Georgia, their initial recording session was in Charlottesville, Virginia. Home can be a comfort, but Third Day has found that it also can hinder creativity. Lead vocalist Mac Powell states, “[B]ecause you are thinking ‘I can be out of here in an hour and be home.’ By not really being able to look at our watches, it was just a productive time for us to be focused and I really feel like we got the results we needed.”

When we step out of our comfort zone, we are able to take risks that we may not attempt otherwise. We can also focus solely on our efforts.

Stretch Yourself Creatively

Not content to stick with the same old sound, Third Day traveled to Los Angeles to work with producer Howard Benson. Benson has worked with artists such as Daughtry, Hoobastank, P.O.D. and Flyleaf. Working with the new producer was often hard and intimidating for the band, but it allowed them to grow and stretch themselves creatively.

We can often fall into the trap of trying to repeat our success by doing the same thing we’ve always done. While this may work for a while, our efforts soon become stale. To remain fresh, we need to stretch ourselves creatively.

Remain True to Your Vision

While Third Day tried to grow musically with their latest release, their message remained true to their vision. The songs on the album present hope, a message not dissimilar from their album Wherever You Are. Longtime fans, collectively known as Gomers, can listen to the new CD and know the band has not compromised their vision.

Hopefully, we have a vision that is guiding our efforts. Although we can and should try new avenues of success, we need to remain true to our underlying vision. Our vision is the foundation upon which we build everything else.

How do bands like Third Day inspire you? Please let me know in the comment section.

(This post is part of Third Day’s Blogging Street Week)

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Jul 24

How to Capture Ideas Before They Escape

Mental Jason Mitchener No Comments »

Moleskine notebook
(Photo by silas216)

I had just started always carrying a notebook and pen around with when I was having a conversation with my friend Tony about giving. I was making the point that building relationships is often more important than just writing a check. I said to Tony, “Love ain’t a one night stand.” (I have this habit of using ain’t when I want to emphasize my opposition.) When I heard myself say that, I knew there was something there besides mere conversation, so I asked Tony to write it down for me in my notebook. This line eventually turned into my Christian country song Love Ain’t a One Night Stand.

As a writer, I’m always looking for ideas for song lyrics, devotional messages, and blog posts. If I’m honest, I’d have to say that ideas are easy to come by … it’s remembering them that’s the problem.

A Portable Memory

I learned in an online writing group that a writer should always have a notebook handy so that when an idea comes, he can quickly record it. The notebook becomes a writer’s portable memory.

Since I’m at the computer most of the day my “notebook” is actually several Word documents. When I get a song idea, I open my “Lyric Scratch Pad” document and type a line or two. When I’m reading my online Bible, if I see a verse that intrigues me I add it to my “Possible Devotional Messages” document. I also have a document titled “Blog Ideas.”

For people who are not at their computer all day or are more comfortable with pen and paper, Moleskine notebooks are more appropriate. The small version can easily fit in a pocket and has an elastic band to keep it closed.

Not Just for Writers

Keeping a notebook and pen handy at all time is not just a good plan for writers, but for everyone. Artists can make quick sketches. Business managers can record marketing ideas. Teachers can make note of lesson ideas. The notebooks can be used for grocery lists, to-do lists, or even doodling while on the phone.

Do you carry around a notebook? If so, how do you use it?

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Jul 19

Laugh Yourself to Good Health

Emotional, Mental, Physical Jason Mitchener 10 Comments »

Laughter
(Image by apdk)

In high school, I was on the mock trial team, where we got court case cases and pretended we were lawyers and witnesses. During practice one afternoon, my friend Crystal pushed my wheelchair up to the front of the classroom so I could cross-examine a witness. She made a turn too sharp and too fast, dumping me on the floor. Our lawyer coach immediately asked, “Would you like help up?” I crossed my hands behind my head and answered, “Nope. I’m comfortable down here.” The whole room of people started cracking up.

I learned from an early age that humor helps ease uncomfortable situations. By making a joke, I saved my friend Crystal and myself from embarrassment. Our laughter helped us stay emotionally healthy.

Emotional/Mental Health Benefits of Laughter

Laughter has many emotional and mental health benefits including …

  • Reducing stress
  • Lowering anxiety
  • Improving our disposition
  • Reducing tension
  • Enhancing our ability to connect with others
  • Replacing distressing emotions with pleasurable feelings
  • Increasing energy

Physical Health Benefits of Laughter

Laughter also has many physical health benefits including …

  • Lowering blood pressure
  • Decreasing stress hormones
  • Increasing infection-fighting antibodies
  • Protecting the heart
  • Giving the body a workout
  • Improving brain function

Increasing Our Laughter

So now that you know the health benefits of laughter, how can you increase the amount of laughter in your life? Here are some ideas ..

How about you? What makes you laugh?

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